happy news!

...I just realized this could sound like WE are pregnant...we are not. My sister-in-law and brother-in-law are having a baby girl in March. :) Yay!



ugh....take two....

I've always had an issue with sometimes thinking too much--beyond considering others thoughts and feelings when making decisions that may involve them --about what other people are thinking. I worry what they'll say when I make a decision..."what would they have done?" "what are they thinking?" "are they upset with me?" Usually it involves something little like the color I painted my living room, or how short I cut my hair...or other times it's something a little bigger like how we are raising our daughter [Santa or no Santa? ;) Spanking or no spanking? Sign language or no sign language? Sugar or no sugar? etc....but that's all another topic that I will probably never blog about again b/c I tend to get myself into too much trouble ;) haha]
...anyway...always worrying about what everyone else is thinking...it's exhausting sometimes!
My decision to go on my fruits and veggies fast was no different...I worried what people were thinking about it and I KNOW I made it into a bigger deal in my head that it probably was...
Denying my body other foods is something I need to do....to force myself to rely on the Lord to give me the self control and teach me the discipline that I need. I know some people may think what I'm doing is ridiculous or over the top...and I am tired of worrying about it! Don't get me wrong, I am NOT blaming others for my failure. I'm blaming myself for letting what I think others are thinking effect me to the point where I would rather not do this and let it go. I can't please everyone.....although it would be FANTASTIC if I could! ;) But I can't.....so I need the Lord and this is something I need to do whether or not you think I'm crazy (which I very well could be).
Well, here's the thing...I have failed MISERABLY.
The first week was okay...I ate alot of carrots and pears and bananas and corn and peas and green beans :)
Then the weekend came and I was CRAVING some sort of sugar or carbohydrate. I began to reason with myself, "maybe if I just take one day a week to indulge my craving to keep me from losing it a few more days in"....then the week followed and I threw the whole thing out the window...I ate what I craved. I would think twice, eat what I wanted, then feel guilty.
The realization finally hit me.....NO! No compromise. No "fun day". No No No No No....that's not the point of this. I need to be the extreme...for me. I need to be broken down in front of Him because I cannot do this on my own...
The last few days have been more of a reflection of what a weak person I am...and how much more I need the Lord.
The point of a fast is to use the time to really put yourself at the Lord's feet in prayer and time with Him. I didn't. The point of a fast is to rely on the Lord to help me when it gets NOT EASY. I didn't. Tears are welling in my eyes b/c I know that I have failed Him and broken my promise--this covenant--I made with Him that I would do this.
In case you didn't know...a covenant is a big deal. (read Our Covenant God by Kay Arthur...it will completely change your perspective about making "promises" especially with the Lord)....
This has been a jumble of my thoughts. I wanted to share b/c I want people to know how weak I am on my own...how much I need the Lord...and I want Him to be glorified in this. My prayer is that others will see how His mercy and His grace are going to pull me through this...I mean come on, He's GOD...I'm only human...I'd be crazy--INSANE--to think that I could do this without Him...I mean HELLO...I only barely made in ONE WEEK! I'm starting over again....the next 4 weeks I'm leaning on God because I NEED HIM.
So here I am again...on my knees...saying "Lord, I know this is ridiculous to alot of people, but it's something my heart needs. This is something I need to do for myself. I need You more than anything and I'm realizing it more everyday. Thank you for chipping at my heart. Thank you for your grace. Let me do this right this time".



10 months and 2 days....what's new?

Adelyn is 10 months and 2 days today! I can't believe it's almost been a year!
LOVES to feed herself and WILL NOT EAT BABYFOOD ANYMORE (I just made huge batches of turkey, garbanzo bean sweet potatoes, and apples with cinnamon....what a waste!)
LOVES baths (HATES when you drain the water and take her out...it's like the end of the world)
has 3 teeth (#4 is looking like it might push through soon?)
says "dada" (still working on "mama")
says "uh-oh" (usually after she intentionally chucks her sippy cup on the floor or drops a toy, or does something she knows she isn't supposed to and then looks at you and says "uh-oh")
crawls like nobodies business
stands on her own for a few seconds, pulls up onto EVERYTHING
LOVES her walker
likes to read books
loves peek-a-boo, patty cake and "chase"
has a major attitude sometimes (especially if you try to feed her) and has discovered the art of temper tantrums (we are so stoked...)
LOVES to Skype (seriously, she and Nora are going to be calling each other without us when they are 2)
daddy's girl in the morning and evening...has no choice but to be mama's girl during the day :)
avoided stranger anxiety....she's never had a problem with new people (should we be glad or worried?)
the joy of our life
There's more, but I think I've gone on enough....I'm just so amazed at how much she changes EVERYDAY and I like to share......I'm sure this stuff is more exciting to Nick and I...but still :)



I really love my...

Skype. Adelyn LOVES to Skype. Whenever she sees one of us sitting down at the computer, or hear's the ring of someone calling us she starts flipping out and beelines it to where we are.
This video is of the other night, Alan and Steph were on their way home from a date and were going to Skype with us....we logged on before they were and we were kind of waiting around for them to get on....Adelyn was on Nick's lap and she just was flipping out waiting for someone in the computer to start talking to her.
I got this video at the end....but she'd been going for almost 10 minutes before I thought to catch it....anyway..it's pretty funny...enjoy :)



homemade teething biscuits...super easy

I cannot take credit for this one...Shaylyn gave me this idea and I LOVE it....no pictures, though, sorry :)
I've been using "Earth's Best" whole wheat teething biscuits since Addy was about 5 months old...she likes them, but they crumble when they get too soggy, then I get worried about her choking on pieces b/c they are actually kinda hard and don't just melt in her mouth the way puffs do.
Since I've been making her baby food (and saving LOADS of cash doing it!)...I was hoping to find a easy way to make the teething biscuits.
Shay gave me this idea at church yesterday and I tried it this AM and I'm sold.
Take a piece of bread (I have stone ground 7 grain bread that I bought fresh made at the bakery), roll it up tight and squeeze it into a stick type...microwave it for a few seconds (I did for 12) and let it cool....the outside hardens, but the inside stays pretty soft and is easier for baby to gum and swallow....
Addy loved it.....my camera was out of battery when she was gnawing on it, or I'd share the joy on her messy little face ;)



cranberry, steak, walnut salad

I love this salad. It's so yummy. My step sister-in-law made something similar for my step-sister's baby shower and I did some research online (instead of doing the easy thing and just asking her for the recipe!) and found one like it. I did some tweaking and this is what I came up with. I really like it and it's pretty quick and super easy.

My task now is to find out how to make it healthier (all that sugar!) since we are going on a sugar hiatus and changing our diet a bit :) Hm...this will be interesting...

Salad ingredients (I don't really have measurements for some of these...just add to your liking):
1 head romaine lettuce chopped
dried cranberries
bleu cheese (I actually like feta cheese here too instead)
cherry tomatoes halved
1-2 grilled steaks (I use the cheap round steak...but New York strip is super good on this one)
basil (fresh or dried)
lemon juice

Dressing ingredients:
1 cup olive oil
1/2 cup balsalmic vinegar
lemon juice to taste
salt and pepper to taste

Season steak with basil and grill. Season with lemon juice when steak is finished. Cut into strips.
Mix together romaine, tomatoes, walnuts, cranberries, cheese, and strip in bowl.
Toss with dressing.

p.s. if you want to make the salad last longer for left overs or something, don't mix it with the dressing...it'll keep for a few days ...



quittin cold turkey

I've been debating for a while now whether or not to "publicly" share this, Matthew 5:16-18 talks about when you are fasting, not to make it known to the world...but because this isn't pulling a "woe to me, I'm starving", it's okay.
A few weeks ago I decided to do a fresh fruit/veggie and one natural protein source a day "fast". Originally I was just want to cleanse my body of all the gunk I've been eating and start over (Nick and I are transitioning to a more organic/whole foods diet...but modifying it to our budget/lifestyle). I mentioned it to Nick and he offered to do it with me. We decided to start November 1 (today!).
Well, the last few weeks I've been really trying to pull out of a slump...some of you know I battle depression and it really kicks you in the gut sometimes. I haven't read my bible in...well...a REALLY long time. As desperate as my spirit feels to be quenched, I've been doing a lot of "Christian motions" lately. I go to church and bible study, and every time I'm praying in vain for my heart to melt and my soul to be satisfied....
I realized that I need to stop trying to work my way back to the Lord with the motions....I really need to lean on Him and find my relationship with Him again. I can't tell you how thirsty my heart and my soul feel right now. I want so badly to be back at that place where He is all I need and my heart can rest in Him.
This month's fast has turned into a spiritual fast for me. Rather than turning to food for my comfort (which I unfortunately have gotten quite good at), the Lord will be my sustenance.
I'm telling you this more for my benefit b/c I know that I will have more of an accountability that if I was just going this alone.
Nick has been so patient with me and he deserves better than how I've just ho-hummed about my spiritual life. I know he's going to walk through this with me b/c I have a feeling we are going to have some break throughs this month. :) I'm quite nervous, actually, b/c getting personal is something I haven't done in a long time....but it's what my soul needs.
I don't even know how many people read this and really, I blog for my own entertainment, but to those who take time from your day to read this...please pray that God will chip away at me this month....as hard as He needs to get through to me.
I'm not planning on following this fast on my blog, but I will definitely share what He does in me as the weeks go by...



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