who decides "too many" or "not enough"?

So I read this blog tonight and I think she totally nailed it.....I've had quite a few discussions this week with co-workers and patients (it's a common discussion with patients, "how many kids do you have? do you want more? how many?") and I figured it'd be okay to blog about it b/c it helps me organize my thoughts a bit better :)
When people ask me how many kids Nick and I want my answer is usually "I want 5, he wants 3, so we are going for 4"(Nick usually adds "but we are taking it one at a time"). Now I understand there are so many factors that play into that, but God willing we can have 4 kids (or 5...whichever :) ). I usually get the some version of the same reaction "what? are you nuts?" "can you afford them?" "why?" etc.... this is where I get a little irked (yes, I just said "irked"). Yes, we can afford as many kids as we want.....they aren't going to have everything they want and we can get really good at second hand stores, but we would be just fine......no, we aren't crazy.....and why not?? I love kids...Nick is an amazing dad...more warriors for the Lord :)
I don't understand why some people get so affronted by the thought of more than the American standard of 2.6 kids....why should everyone be held to that number? Whether a family adopts or gets pregnant...some people do just fine with one....others can have a soccer team. :)
I know there are some exceptions and in some cases it wouldn't be a good idea to add another body to the brood...but who gets to tell a family they have "too many" kids or "only" a few?
I remember a friend of ours was pregnant with twins...she was out somewhere and had her two young ones in tow.....someone saw her and gave her a look of pity and was like "you poor thing I feel so bad for you" (or something like that) and she thought "why?". When she told us that story I thought she was dead on. Why? Obviously they weren't going for twins :) but God blessed them with 2 more and you don't need to feel sorry for them!
Okay, so I know some people are now thinking "what about the people who don't mean to have more or get pregnant?". I don't know...again, there are so many exceptions and circumstances... but what I'm talking about now is a husband and wife's CHOICE to have more children (whether adopting or getting pregnant).
On the flip side...I have heard people say "they only have one" or "they just have 2 kids"....I know that some people don't mean that as it sounds, but those that do....why does everyone have to have more than one or two?? I have a friend from school who will be the first to admit she is not the "motherly" type :) but she has always said that she could see herself wanting to have a baby if she ever got married b/c that child would be part her and part him...but no more than the one :) Anyway...what I'm getting at is that it's her decision....whether she brings them into this world herself or adopts.
I know everyone is going to have an opinion and it is something we could go around and around about and I think there are good arguments for both sides...like I said, though...I am addressing the part where people think I'm nuts for wanting 5 kids.
In the meantime...if you see me years down the road with 4 kids and tow and pregnant with #5 (as Nick is gasping for air right now at the thought) :) don't feel sorry for me....no matter how tired and ragged I am.....I have an amazing husband who is my partner in parenting :) I will be blissfully happy with our amazing little terrors gifts.